Posts Tagged
‘authenticity’

Hello Queens,

I hope you are well and thriving. Another memoir is heading our way and I wonder if I am interested in reading it.

Jada Pinkett Smith is a complex tapestry of experiences, a multi-layered persona that never fails to astound. Her recent revelation about her seven-year separation from Will Smith, while still being married, has ignited a flurry of discussions. Some may say, “Who cares?” as we’ve seemingly heard so much about their relationship. Yet, beneath the surface, there’s something that feels unspoken as if there’s more to the story.

At first glance, you might wonder why she’s sharing this deeply personal tale with the world. It’s a fair question. After all, what drives someone to reveal such intimate details? But let’s be honest; most of us haven’t yet delved into the pages of her book to find the answer.

Having briefly crossed paths with Will and Jada and knowing people who’ve worked with them, I can vouch for their character. They are good people. However, like many of us, their lives are not without complexities. The key difference is that they live under the constant scrutiny of the public eye, navigating their personal lives and careers on a grand stage.

When you observe their dynamic, you can’t help but notice a pattern. We often hear about their relationship from Jada’s perspective, while Will remains guarded. He rarely speaks about her outside of family or work contexts. There’s a protective shield he puts around her, and vice versa, well, most of the time.

This raises questions. Does Jada ever feel that her voice won’t be heard unless it’s intertwined with Will’s? It’s crucial to remember that she’s a talented actress. In the past, she was the “it girl.” She was the leading lady. But when she became Mrs. Will Smith, her career seemed to take a backseat. Is there an underlying resentment?

I’m not here to gossip, but I’m examining this situation from the perspective of countless women who have relinquished some of their autonomy in pursuit of a traditional marriage, driven by ideals rather than reality.

In the world of relationships, we find couples leading separate lives, inhabiting different corners of the house or even different cities. Some are best friends rather than romantic partners. Marriages are forged for reasons ranging from convenience, and security, to power. Love, while paramount, is not without its struggles. Even Michelle Obama once confessed that she couldn’t stand her husband for the first ten years of their marriage.

While I might still find myself in the midst of not caring, I believe that Jada is contributing to the broader conversation initiated by Michelle Obama. It’s a call for honesty in relationships. The romanticized notions of “couple goals” and “black love” have pushed us farther away from the raw, unfiltered truth of what marriage truly entails. It’s a pact, a promise shared by two people. Disney’s magic has painted it as a fairytale.

The truth is that relationships can be arduous when the chemistry is off. The question that lingers is whether Jada is contemplating her identity outside of the shadow of Will Smith. She sacrificed so much to be with him, to live within his concept of marriage. Perhaps this book marks her journey towards personal freedom, truth, and inner justice. It could be her way of feeling worthy enough to have her voice heard. And maybe, it’s her exploration of who she is when she’s not defined by someone else’s identity. Especially someone as powerful as a Hollywood icon. Somewhere along the way, the castle he built for her might have started to resemble a prison.

These thoughts are not merely gossip or idle musings; they reflect the broader reality that many of us lead dual lives. The one the world sees and the one that stares back at us in the mirror.

So, when I wonder why Jada is sharing her story, it’s not because I don’t care about her marriage stories. Instead, I’m genuinely curious about what she’s freeing as she unveils her truth and journey. I hope she wholeheartedly embraces herself and recognizes the audacity to be fully Jada Pinkett, without the Smith.”

If you are interested in reading Worthy by Jada you can check it out HERE.

Chat Soon,

Monica Wisdom

Hey Queen,

I hope you are doing well and thriving.

As women entrepreneurs, online visibility is more crucial than ever in today’s crowded digital landscape. Among the countless AI-generated content and personas, authenticity and sharing your true self have become vital. However, there’s no need to dive into true confessions; instead, you can make a significant impact by sharing bits of your real life in an engaging way.

The key here is to curate what you share and how you share it. Remember that once something is on the internet, it’s there forever. Be mindful of the path your story takes, including who it involves, who it’s about, and why you’re sharing it. These considerations are essential to ensure that you never regret the stories you tell.

Let’s be clear; I’m not suggesting sharing your deepest, most personal truths. We all have sensitive matters in our lives that should be handled with care. What I’m advocating is authenticity in your online presence, whether on social media, in your speeches, or any platform where you share your story. The distinction I’m making is between maintaining a persona and embracing your true personality.

Yes, you can present a polished image, but authenticity embeds honesty. It’s about sharing the actual happenings in your life, not creating fairy tales. There are methods to convey the essence of a story without disclosing every single detail. Exceptional storytellers share in a way that has a profound impact while preserving the power and essence of their story, without becoming overly confessional.

I had to learn this lesson myself. When I initially shared my story, it was often from a place of deep pain, which didn’t resonate with people and sometimes pushed them away. I discovered how to tell my story from a position of strength and reserved the intricate details for more intimate settings, like healing sessions.

The idea is to connect with your audience, not merely confess. The goal is to provide people with an understanding of who you are, what you stand for, and the journey of your life. This doesn’t necessitate divulging every minute detail of a particular circumstance. Whether it’s a 90-second social media clip or a longer format, every story should have a beginning, middle, and end. People are more interested in how you emerged on the other side than in the exact tunnel you traveled through.

With Love,

Monica Wisdom

The Story Maven & the Host of the Black Women Amplified Podcast.

 

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